Tom, 60, watched his mum Elsie, 88, push a provider letter across the kitchen table. "You deal with it, love — it's all gobbledygook to me." Elsie is sharp as a tack about everything that matters: who she wants in her house, what she'll spend, how she likes her tea. It's the paperwork that defeats her. Tom is happy to take it on — he just isn't sure what he's actually allowed to do. Sign things? Ring the provider? Talk to My Aged Care?
Tom's story is an illustrative scenario, created to show how Support at Home works in practice. It is not a real client testimonial.
Tom's situation is one of the most common in aged care: a parent who's entirely capable of making decisions but wants a trusted person handling the machinery. Here's what the rules allow — and the important distinction at the heart of it all.
Acting with your parent vs acting for them
Acting with your mum means she remains the decision-maker while you do the legwork: reading the letters, joining phone calls, tracking the budget, liaising with the provider. All it needs is her consent. This covers the overwhelming majority of what families like Tom's actually do.
Acting for your mum means making decisions on her behalf — which is a much bigger step, involving formal arrangements, and generally only relevant when someone can no longer make particular decisions themselves. Most families never need it. The distinction matters because it's easy to reach for formal authority you don't actually need — and in doing so, sideline a parent who's perfectly able to choose.
Supporter arrangements under the new Act
The new Aged Care Act, which commenced on 1 November 2025, includes registered supporter arrangements — a way for an older person to formally nominate someone to act with or, where needed, for them in the aged care system. It's designed to put the older person's will and preferences at the centre, not to hand control to families.
The details of registering are handled through My Aged Care, so if Elsie wants Tom formally in the loop — able to speak with My Aged Care and receive communications — the right move is to call 1800 200 422 together and ask how to set it up.
What a family login covers day to day
Here's the practical bit many families miss: for the everyday running of a care plan, you often don't need formal authority at all — you need a provider built for families. With Partner with Care, your mum simply agrees for you to have your own login, with your own alerts and view. You can see the budget, every claim and every payment the moment it moves; she sees her plan and her workers on her screen. Two named contacts — one for care, one for finance — mean your questions get a same-day answer without Elsie having to relay anything. See how it fits together on our for families page.
A good rule for every decision: handle the paperwork for your parent; make the choices with them. Elsie doesn't need to read the claims file — but which worker comes on Tuesdays, and whether the gardening moves to fortnightly, are her calls. That split keeps you useful and keeps her in charge.
Keeping your parent in the driver's seat
Under self-managed Support at Home, "control" isn't all-or-nothing — it's shared sensibly. Your mum chooses her workers and services; you watch the budget and the admin; the registered provider handles claiming and compliance behind the scenes. If you're unsure what arrangement fits your family — informal consent, a registered supporter, or something more formal — talk to us and check with My Aged Care (1800 200 422) about the options.